Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Pruning time

Gemini (May 21–June 20)
Many plants grow better if you prune them. Getting rid of a bunch of dead stuff makes room for all the fresh new leaves to have unrestricted access to the sun. Your life could use a bit of pruning this spring. While you're perfectly capable of growing and even thriving under current conditions, there are definitely things holding you back from reaching your full potential. You have the tools, you have the knowledge—isn't it time you cut yourself free? If you hesitate because not everything you want to trim away is strictly dead, keep in mind that it could hit the ground, take root, and grow into a beautiful plant all on its own—and then everybody wins.

I'm going to take a little time to reflect on this horoscope. What should I be trimming from life? What could we all trim from our lives? It seems sometimes that we try to hang onto things that really are just weighing us down. Even in this vagabond lifestyle, I continue to hold onto kilos of junk that I really don't need, and that's not counting the emotional baggage.

This week, I reclaimed my bags from storage and tried to pear down my belongings, then shipped most of it off to the United States in care of Shanta, who is kindly going to receive the boxes should they ever clear customs and arrive in the States again. So that if I return , I'll have what I need. ("Need" is truly an interesting concept.) I've also decided that if it all went missing en route, I wouldn't have too much remorse either because I'm really just happy to have it all GONE.

Returning to Auckland has forced a resurgence of all the nagging questions. (One of the drawbacks to English speakers galore.) What are you doing with your life? Where are you going next? Are you coming back to the university? Don't you have to rejoin the working world again? All the questions I was happy not to have thrown in my face all the time while I was in Asia, but things I wonder myself. Dwelling on the questions doesn't bring me answers, so I try to just live day by day for now, waiting for life to reveal itself to me instead.

In the morning, I leave Auckland for Lake Taupo on the public bus. I'm looking forward to a some solitude again. Staring out the window in contemplation as Radiohead swirls by my ears and landscapes dramatise for my eyes seems like a good respite from the baggage that I've encountered in Auckland.

I don't know what's next. I've been so happy seeing the world and meeting people. Learning new things. Being myself. Enjoying slowness and peace. Auckland, as much of an old friend as it is, is not a place of peace. I feel my internal stress creeping up day by day and I know moving on is the right thing to do.

Pruning season has begun...

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