"What screws us up in life is the picture in our head of how it is suppose to be."
I've been sitting here evaluating job offers, potential positions, & locations for work. Most of my figuring has been surrounding money. Calculating and recalculating the possibilities, as if figures on paper will suddenly create an answer and make sense of my circumstances. (I've had a lifelong infatuation with math & algebra, so this explains some of it.)
I realized I'm asking the wrong questions. I'm evaluating everything based on money, but where is that in relation to my life values? I need enough to live. Enough to pay the bills. Enough to stay out of my savings. But what after that? Is more really better?
What if I worked enough to travel here (at home, in the USA) through education, friendships, love & family? Most American jobs offer two weeks leave, including sick time, a pittance of an offer in relation to what I give up in return: 40+ hours in a windowless office, repeating the same lines over and over. I'm not saying that everyone has to love their job, but the ratio of time working to time living is out of sync.
I've done well in the last four years choosing lifestyle over stability- I just need to stay on that path and keep marching forward. I'm going to keep striving for the stars and trusting in the universe, moving toward openings, and living life.
"This was better than I imagined I could do."