Friday, May 10, 2013

Sunshine and Bikes

So we haven't lost the dog lately. We keep checking the doors (three times) before we leave. I'm paranoid that he's slipped out the door when we weren't looking. So far so good. 

I rode to work today. Just over five miles. In under thirty minutes. 

There's something about cycling to work that makes the day feel right. Sun shining down the road, rolling along, hugged by trees, the music of the motors and cyclists... I pedal my heart out, pushing my muscles harder and harder, feeling stronger by the minute and proud of body. The benefit of exercise is feeling good about yourself. 

Feeling alive. Riding up to work. Front door parking. Or pulling the bike into the back room, safe from thieving hands. (They say that when you're at work or in class is when the bike is most likely to disappear.) 

Filling in today downtown in an optical shoppe with two walls of windows, the ladies fitting the glasses were decked out in sweet skirts and fun shoes. Dan Auerbach wafted over the speakers. It was quiet and peaceful and laid back. I wondered what it would be like to work somewhere like that. 

We've been mulling over ideas and life the last few weeks. Houses and jobs and other things.

I keep trying to be nice to everyone and live in the moment. And look for the beauty in the world. 

I keep wondering where to go. What to do. Should I return to an old job? Should we buy a house? Should we have kids? Is it ok to stay in Portland? (I think so.)

We just go day by day. I don't think you can do much else. 

The thing about being here is that we're free from the vortex of family dramas. We're free to be our own relationship. With our own ideas. Not under the wings of anyone's mom. Neither one of us is the other's tote. 

It's easy and it's not to extract yourself from a sticky isolated life and join in a new one with someone else. I think in the end you have to chose a relationship and chose that person over everyone and everything else. Make your own music and dance. That is life.

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