inspired adventurer: June 2012

Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Dying a little bit more each day

It’s not a joke

It’s real

I am

And you are

So are the trees and the stars

It’s not just a depressing

Sensation

Seeping through your blood

Drying you up inside

Wishing for your own demise

When you’re standing underneath

The showerhead

Hot water won’t wash it away

It’s the truth.

We are all dying a little inside

Every day.

Monday, June 25, 2012

On Traveling, from Africa Solo

"My anxieties lightened as we went along, a sense of relief and surety building throughout the day. I found myself increasingly happy to be moving south, away from the crowded coast. The bus cruised along for hours, stopping in the little farming towns and I kept thinking, I am going. Now I am really going. I felt like an adventurer, researcher, and time traveler , all rolled into one. I felt like a diver bouncing high at the edge of a board, ready to fly into some wondrous dive. Having moved beyond my foreseeable plans, I began to feel the thrill of truly exploring." - from Africa Solo, by Kevin Kertscher.

I remember thinking almost those same thoughts when I was on the back of a pick up truck converted to a bus in rural southern Thailand heading south... And now, the thoughts could be construed to have meaning in my life back in the states. It doesn't matter much what or where I am going, just that I am going... and feeling the thrill of being alive now.

Thursday, June 21, 2012

Medical Care Corruption

Being a medical provider, I find it morally offensive that someone would ask me to deliberately mislead a patient in hopes that they will purchase something that they do not need so that a business can line their pockets with some extra cash.

This has been a theme with a long history in my field and in many medical fields.

When medical care became business and money centered, it ceased to select the best advice for the patient. It became commerce. It became about the bottom line.

When a patient is told they need a procedure or device by a trusted medical provider, it is probably not without some reservations that they would decline the treatment. After all, who wants to wrong their body?

But when the drivers of healthcare are companies concerned primarily with profits and way down the line with healthcare, what do you expect?

Saturday, June 16, 2012

Back on the Outer Banks [for now]

Whispering breezes, birds singing & clanking windcatchers-

it's cold out on the porch in Buxton.

A few days ago, I was nervous about returning, and starting work again. Anxiety about finding an apartment and the whole thing. One of these days I think that life will feel more settled, but I'm not sure.

Olden days, revisited for my birthday.

I haven't cross-stitched in 18 years.

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Bonnaroo aftermath

Herein lies a plethora of pictures. I have some thoughts on Bonnaroo. Mostly that it was more laid back than I figured it would be, and by the end I was sad to be leaving the little oasis in the countryside of Manchester, TN, where wifi and cell service eluded us for about five days... a welcome reprieve from the daily grind. (Still need a break from the daily grind when unemployed.) Now we're heading back East to Buxton and soon I'll be in the throes of optometric life again, earning some wages and flipping some dials. Transitioning again.

The infamous mushroom, day one.